Missed ellaneous

China has done the Mulan thing and has somehow made a man out of me. A strong lawyer might be able to make a compelling argument that I have an actual beard and moustache. It probably should go, but for the first time in my life I am in the position to partake in no shave November.

I should have to wear a garbage bag when I eat. There is not a white shirt I own that isn’t covered with oil blotches. The meals here are like double scoop ice cream cones in mid-July, no matter how careful you are they just get everywhere.

Chinese business strategy is bamboozling. It is way more expensive to buy things in bulk than to buy them individually wrapped. For example, one packet of coffee is 1.00 kuai while a box of 10 packets is 18.00 kuai, it truly is confounding. There is also an area of town that has five hair salons in a row. I understand putting a bar next to a bar increases business for both, but I can’t imagine a customer getting multiple haircuts in succession.

To our delight, a new restaurant opened up right next to us. Its menu includes western style fries, chicken sandwiches and cold soda. To sit down, you must first climb up a ladder to reach their “cozy” dining area. I use the term cozy because the ceiling is about 4 and a half feet tall.

I know full well that I am a terrible singer, however I made an incredible discovery at a KTV that I can sing/perform Natalie Imbruglia’s “Torn” perfectly. Some may argue that my cover is in fact better, like Jimi Hendrix’s version of “All Along the Watchtower.” The magic; however, did not last long as I nonkosherly butchered Regina Specktor in the next song.